August 20, 2017 –
Diego and I hitch hiked from the strawberry farm to Luang Prabang (which by the way turned out really well considering we had planned to take a bus that didn’t show up). Three Chinese guys in a truck picked us up. They drove like maniacs and didn't speak English and played odd techno remixes the whole way, but they were kind and dropped us only 25 km away. Then we got a second ride from a Thai guy who drove us all the way into the city. We sat in the bed of his truck and enjoyed the views. Once here, we walked to our hostel and chilled. Diego disappeared so I decided to take a walk. I went to some cafes and walked past lots of temples and along the Mekong to watch the boat races that were happening as part of some festival going on. This town is charming and small. I like it. The night turned out much different than expected. Walking back to the hostel a group of Laotian men sitting drinking and eating on the side of the street in front of their shop invited me to join them. Not having much to do, I decided why not and sat down. I thought I'd just be there for a glass of beer or two but ended up spending the whole evening with them. They shared their beer and food and I shared my banana bread cause that's all I had. We sat there for a time people watching and I listened to their conversation but didn't understand anything obviously. Only one of them spoke a tiny bit of English. Then, they invited me to go to dinner with them at some friend’s house. I was unsure at first but decided to just keep going with it and it was such an experience. We drove to the house and once everyone was there it was probably 20 people. All Laotion except me. Mostly old men lol. The beer kept coming and coming and there was so much food too. They were the nicest people. We ate river eel soup, cucumber, I tried one of the butterfly bugs (gross), bamboo, shrimp - such a display of Laotian cuisine and culture. I was honestly uncomfortable at first and at times felt awkward but kept reminding myself that it is good to put yourself in these situations and feel like this sometimes. I learned so much more about the people here and their lifestyles than I could have any other way. Idk why but they seemed really happy to host me and share their lives. People are so kind. We left about 8:30pm, and I offered to pay for my portion because it seemed like everyone had chipped in for the party but they refused. They were too happy to welcome me and enjoy life. They probably thought I was crazy but that's ok, I guess I kind of am a little anyway. The guys drove me back and dropped me off at the hostel, so nice. I ran inside to say hey to Diego and use the bathroom then walked to the night market. On the way back a group of guys with motorcycles invited me to go drink with them but I was already tipsy and decided I'd had my fair share of drinking with locals for the day, so I declined and went back and passed out.
I think the main thing I want to say about all this is that going with the flow leads to really interesting experiences. And also that sometimes it feels weird to go with the flow and to say yes to opportunity. Travel allows for a lot of these types of opportunities – for the chance to be spontaneous I mean. If I were in my hometown, the chances that I would be hitch-hiking and accepting beer invites from old dudes are slim – well, slimmer. But the point is that there is a beauty in saying yes, even if it feels strange. And also there is a lot of good that comes from being able to pivot and just go with the experience rather than trying to control it.
Even from the start of the day, Diego and I were forced to switch plans. I remember we actually got into a small argument over it, but ultimately both of us decided to just get over it and try to hitch a ride. And in the end we arrived to Luang Prabang more quickly than we would have on a bus… thanks to our techno blasting Chinese friends. Letting go of the need to control the situation opened up a different and even better door for us. It’s the idea of flow versus resistance.
And then there is the whole experience of me winding up at some random potluck party. I never really planned anything when backpacking. I steered clear of TripAdvisor signs and just meandered, hoped to learn about new cultures and was open to see what the day would bring. This attitude opened up a lot of possibilities, but that does not mean it was completely without a little discomfort. Crashing a local party (even if it was by invite) and sitting there like an idiot, smiling while everyone stares at you because you stand out like a sore thumb and have no idea how to say anything in their language except “hello” and “thank you,” is not necessarily comfortable. But it is interesting. And although it did feel weird at first, eventually the awkwardness gave way to the warmth of connection and the excitement of cultural experience. Sometimes you just have to go with it.
That being said, since growth and newness can feel a little uncomfortable at times, it is good to recognize the difference between the discomfort of pushing your boundaries in a healthy way versus the discomfort of knowing something isn’t right for you. Embracing the flow sometimes is knowing when to say no as well. Earlier in the day, accepting an unexpected dinner party invite was a yes. Later, when the motorcycle guys invited me to drink, I was tired, and it was a no. Going with the flow is not about saying yes to everything; it means recognizing what feels right in the moment.
Thumbnail Credit: Azzurra Galatolo, “Evolution” 2024